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Blogs > SilyconBond > I'm a dumpster fire |
How come My Cosco doesn't sell condoms? #0003
How come My Cosco doesn't sell condoms? #0003 It's got nearly nearly everything else. I found a jumbo sized plastic container of cheese puffs, and if I ate them all, I would be twice as big as the container they came in. I didn't buy them, but the<b> temptation </font></b>was there. I found three different styles of feminine hygiene products in huge boxes. I asked the woman shopping next to me if wings were better..and that was mistake. I nodded my head patiently while she gave me her whole life history boiled down to thirty minutes. Luckily I was saved by Costco by them closing the store. That's were I would put the condoms, right next to the pads and lube. That's were my Target has them. I am the world's worst person on closing conversations once I open them up. I enjoy talking to complete strangers and gaining rapport. Yet, almost bond with them when they tell me of their miseries and injustices. I used to close with a handshake...Handshake, gotta go. Now...I need to find something different. I tried a joking closer, and it backfired on me. The grandma I was talking to started crying on my shoulder. Then she invited me over for dinner, so I went. My friends were most upset I ditched them for lasagna, but all they were offering was pizza. No contest there. It's not my favorite place to shop. Walmart is. I'm normally the most attractive person shopping there. Plus, I see the strangest things at that store. It's the only store I can get everything in one go. Screwdriver? Yup. Duck tape? Yep. Orange juice? Yep. A t-shirt with the batman logo on it? Of course. Plus all the items seen on TV. At least if I was to watch TV, I am sure I would see them there. My store is always out of the 24 pack, the twelve pack of condoms...but the empty slots are there..teasing me to come back later for a lower price. I know lots of people that hate shopping, but to me, its an adventure. Always something new to see, someone new to talk to, and it gives me ideas. I was at hardware store near Lehi Utah once looking for a shortened end wrench when I met this older gentleman named Joel. I needed a wrench that was six inches, all of them were eight. He invited me to his house so he could cut one in half for me. Keep in mind this was almost nine at night on a Friday night, not a machine shop open anywhere in Utah at that time. So I agreed. It morphed into a friendship that lasted until he died two years later. All that knowledge he had about simplifying work, gone to dust. I still see that shortened wrench at work. He even ground the cut edge smooth for me that night. I have since passed it on to another engineer, and I get this warm feeling when he tells me he used it on this or that project. Now, where was I? Oh yeah.. Where did I put that book I was reading? Mighty, Mighty Out |
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