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| Blogs > Rubyrosette2011 > Sugar, Spice, Naughty and Nice |
Sampling the Buffet
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Sampling the Buffet  Someone asked me a question last night at dinner when they discovered that as a pastime, I wrote erotica and it’s one that I got asked more than once including by some of my friends. Not to mention guys I go out with, and I mention it. The guys seem to be more accepting of it than the women and then more often than not, they want to hear or read a sampling.  Some people ask me if I’m writing erotica because I’m not having sex. I just look at them but it’s a common question along with the statement that often follows. They say well, I’d rather be having sex than write about it. It’s hard to disagree with that if you look at it in black or white as an either/or dynamic. I’m sure even the radio sex expert Dr. Ruth who I had the pleasure to meet would agree. But she spoke on erotica a few times and that writing erotica and living it weren’t necessarily mutual exclusive. I totally agree, and I think that’s probably true of cyber sex as well. The way I see it is that it’s not an either/or situation meaning that you’re either writing erotica or having cybersex or having sex in the non-virtual world. Yes, it’s possible to do two or more of these activities, one of them being sex and be happy with it. Life’s a buffet after all, and there are different things to sample in that buffet. I enjoy all three activities very much. Erotica’s great for sharing what you wrote with your lover, especially in long distance relationships and if you’ve been there, you know how challenging those can be. Cell phone plans can be maxed and bills can be very high quickly enough because when you’re both hot and bothered and really into it, time passes quickly. Sharing erotica with the man or woman you’re with can be pretty…erotic. And so can cyber sex as well. They can also help you through as some people call them, dry spells especially if like me, you have a high sex drive or when you’re laid up and can’t be as physically active. Discovering erotica writing can be liberating as well. A while back, I posted a story online at a site just to feel the waters and received a response back that I must be really bored to be writing. I wrote back and said, I very seldom get bored because as long as you have imagination you can always find something captivating to do. That I just have an imagination that I love expressing in different ways including sexually and one of those ways is through writing. What happened was that we started chatting and he wanted to craft his own erotica but it’s sometimes difficult to start so we worked at it and he turned out to be awesome. He had no interest in me really; I think he had someone else he wanted to show that side of himself, in ways perhaps differently than he usually did. You don’t know whether you’ll really enjoy an activity or will be good at it until you try it. I crafted some more recently during my um, absence and was sharing some ideas about it with this guy who works at a store which sells lingerie, sexual toys, the works. He’s really good at helping singles and couples with their questions in ways that help them feel comfortable and good. I did some shopping and ended up saving more than I spent…on items including a leopard pattern<b> waterproof </font></b>vibe. It just looked too pretty to pass up. I like vibes but I can’t wait to try this one out on someone else. But the sales guy and I while checking out vibes (and this guy’s an encyclopedia on them) talked about it, and he said it was very popular for couples. I discovered the site's magazine and started posting erotica there that was fun to read so I decided to post a couple of stories recently for fun…because it is fun. |
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8/21/2011 3:11 pm |
You're right, writing is fun. It's a great way to work out any pent up sexual tension and it helps you understand yourself sexually. Personally I think it more of a turn on for the writer than the person reading it. It's a shame more people don't do it but it is a lot of work.
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I agree. i think it can be a turn on for both the writer and the reader speaking as both as I like to read it as well as write it. If something I write turns a reader on, I think that's great and I think the act of writing it is as well. It helps if you're in the mood for it, sometimes a glass of wine, some dark chocolate and the right music. And yes, it's about invoking the different senses.
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